Who is calling the shots?

Getting Mom changed, medicated and in bed was tough tonight. Louis nailed it when he said sometimes Mom seems like she knows what we need to happen to make it work and so she does the exact opposite. When I tried to give her her medicine she clamped down her teeth so tight, there was no way to get past them. I got a little loud saying "MOM, pleeeeaase open your mouth and she said "Okay" with a smirk, she opened her mouth a little bit and I said "Ok thanks, can you open it a little more?" She said "I caaan't". Hmmmmm ... so no medicine for her tonight. So ok then I will let her call the shots, if she does not want to take her medicine I am not going to make her. Besides I can't make her without calling in troops to hold her mouth open and risk choking her! I think sometimes Mom just gets tired of not being able to make her own decisions and so she clamps down, whether it be her teeth, her shoulders unwilling to roll, or her feet that just will not stay on the foot rests of the wheelchair once you get them on there.

Also, Mom seems mad at me for something since we left the hospital and here is my take on it. When we were preparing to leave the nurse was removing the tape from the IV and the foley and Mom was not a happy camper. What I SHOULD have done was what I always do and that is leave the room when things that hurt happen so she does not associate it with me. Instead I stayed and held her hand and she looked directly at me screaming to stop while oblivious to the nurse that was doing the deed. Ever since that moment she has looked at me with such contempt. So when does that memory move from short term to not so short term but not really long term so she forgets it? Never ever be present, if you can help it, for negative things!